Longings

Longings

There’s a longing in the soul
A piece of me a-waitin’
To let loose to the love within

There’s a longing in the heart
Filled, full and overflowing
Ready, ripe and expectant

There’s a longing in the being
Which knows there’s more of a meaning
Then keeping all this flowing within this
Wretched soul

There’s a piece of me a-waitin’
With so much, that I’m bursting
Ready, for the giving to another
Of similar yearning

But ready, and ripe as this heart may be
God tells me to be awaiting
For His perfect working

Though I am ready,
And the clock seems to be delaying
God knows the timing
And He tells me
I may share this yearning love
With a distressing, and weary world

The secret in my waiting is, He says
That if I share this love abroad
In His perfect way
Then and only then
Will I truly be ready for the one of similar yearning.

~Anna Dunlap

This is the first poem I've ever written. I was inspired through watching two lovers, and while I yearn for the day which I have one to love in such a way, I realized that this love that God has gifted me with doesn't have to suppressed but can be shared with all the people he puts into my path. For love is something which is not divided, but multiplied... It grows and the more love I pour out the more that God gives. And thus, my poem flowed from this desire for a companion, but greater yet from the realization that I must wait, and though I feel ready, the time as not yet come...So in the meantime, I have the joy of sharing the love God gives me with others.

Wondrous Enigma - the reflections of a whimsical damsel

Oh, the astounding, inexplicable mysteries life holds...Life full of twists, turns, adventure, trials, laughter, awe, heartache, joy and enigmas... As Elizabeth Elliot wrote in her book, Keep a Quiet Heart, "Some things are simply too wonderful for explanation - the navigational system of the Arctic tern, for example. How does it find its way over twelve thousand miles of ocean from its nesting grounds in the Arctic to its wintering grounds in the Antarctic! Ornithologists have conducted all sorts of tests without finding the answer. Instinct is the best they can offer- no explanation at all, merely a way of saying that they really have no idea. A Laysan albatross was once released 3,200 miles from its nest in the Midway Islands. It was back home in ten days. The Migration of birds is a thing too wonderful."

Similarly, I see the mystery of life and how it unfolds as a 'thing simply too wonderful for explanation'. David in one of his prayers to our Lord wrote, "Lord, my heart in not proud; my eyes are not haughty. I don't concern myself with matters too great or too awesome for me to grasp. Instead, I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother's milk. Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me." (Psalm 131) That is a rather absurd way for a modern person to describe the state of their soul - like a weaned child... ha ha, but its true, we don't always understand the riddles that life presents but we know the One who does. This One not only understands it, but created it, loves it and is the sovereign ruler of life. So my duty as a human that wants to serve God with her whole being is too be calmed and quieted in the bosom of the Savior. 'May it suffice me, as it sufficed Mary, to know that God knows. So if it's time to work, may I get on with my job. If it's time to go to bed, may I sleep in peace and let the Lord of the Universe do the worrying (paraphrase of E. Elliot).'

I hope this makes a little sense. Life isn't a total mystery though in Deuteronomy when Isreal is being called to return to the Lord they are told, "This command (to turn to the Lord) I am giving you is not too difficult for you to understand, and it is not beyond your reach. It is not kept in heaven, so distant that you must ask, "Who will go up to heaven and bring it down so we can hear it and obey?...No, the message is very close at hand; it is on your lips and in your heart so that you can obey it (30:11-14)." God gives what we need for today...

So let me repeat, "May it suffice me, as it sufficed Mary, to know that God knows." I must rest in my Savior. I must keep my heart quiet in my Savior. I must. So must you.

It's been awhile since, I've written anything about myself personally. This past year has most been one of the most difficult, challenging but blessed years of my life. Sounds kind of like a paradox. Let's see where I should start...

Well, I'm once again surrounded by homework, I am sitting in a prestigious looking, brick dorm built in 1887 on the beautiful campus of 1600 college students nestled in the hills of Kentucky. This dorm is my new home for the next three years. The journey which brought me to this place was interesting.

Community college ended up being the most difficult things I've ever done... Every preconceived idea of what college would be like was crushed. If I could do things over again, I would change a lot of things I did. But, the past is the past and cannot be 'redone'... reflecting I see many, many hard lessons learned that would not have been otherwise. Startling facts about myself where staring me in the face such as how what an unutterable self-fish person I am and how easily my heart can be swayed...basically, I was so all wrapped up in myself to the point of being depressed. Anyhow, Easter was kinda a break through for me when I realized that the secret to contentment is 'Christ in me not me in a different set of circumstances'. I had to, as is a daily journey, learn to embrace surrender and serve others.

Anyhow, at the end of my second semester of my freshmen year of school, I had no desire to set-foot-in-school again, but I was accepted to another college an hour and a half from my home with a $27,000 scholarship. A blessing wearing a disguise at the time. Also, in the early spring I was pursuing the possibility of nannying for a missionary family in Isreal. I had heard about a program which connects ladies willing to help a missionary family to a family who would appreciate extra help with their family. Anyhow, I began to feel that this pursuit was more my excitment for adventure then God's will... So I prayed, "If you want me to go to Isreal let it work out if not I'll stay home." It fell through and I thought, "Ok, God, what is this about?" Intentionally, I thought I might know why (but that was definitely ended up not being why). So, I moved back home. Actually, moved into the cabin on my parents property with Grandma. I began my summer working at a children's home in the area I had worked at before...at the home, I worked with the handicap and cared for them each day along with other women. And I love my job! In early, June God brought my family a new sister, Esther. This young lady was kicked out of her home and needed a place to live... So Esther moved in with us... and I realized why God had me stay in Kentucky. It was a very blessed, full and challenging summer. And there where so many experiences and things I learned that I cannot share here... Thus life continues, summer ended all to quickly and I did set my feet back in school...both feet, I made the decision and the dive and am here. This school is much different from the last and I have nothing to complain about... maybe I shall share about this experience soon.

Well, I hope something of these ramblings can be meaningful to you. The Lord is good and his mercy endures forever. Never forget that :)

Creation - [kree-ey-shuhn]

“Some people, in order to discover God, read books. But there is a great book: the very appearance of created things. Look above you! Look below you! Read it. God, whom you want to discover, never wrote that book with ink. Instead He set before your eyes the things that He had made. Can you ask for a louder voice than that?”

— St. Augustine (354-430)

A Proposal to Consider

Divorce is an epidemic in our country. I would dare to say, every family has been affected by this ever increasing epidemic in one way or another. In my own life three of my immediate aunts and uncles have divorced. I can recall listening to 89 year old, grandfatherly Bill Anacker stating thoughtfully that of all the families he knew across the country only the family of his own wife had none of the adult siblings divorced. In other words, in almost every family he could think of there had been at least one divorce. It is estimated that roughly 40 – 50% of current marriages will end in divorce before one of the partners die (Popnoe and Whitehead). With each remarriage the likelihood of divorce increases substantially. Divorce is a problem in our society.

Divorce hasn’t always been so prevalent in past generations. The percentage of divorce was four times lower in 1960 than it was in 2000 (Popnoe and Whitehead). Marriage was traditionally upheld as a sacred relationship before God, man and society in which both persons committed to each other for the purpose of procreation and child rearing. It was a commitment assumed to last until “death did them part”. Furthermore, rarely did couples marry for love alone. Stephanie Coonz, author of numerous books on marriage and family in America, pointed this out in her article “The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love”, “Only rarely in history was love seen as the main reason for getting married” (Coonz). Unlike today, love was generally not perceived as a pre-requisite for entering marriage. Rather, it was understood that married persons would grow in love for one another. Because marriage was held so highly, it was considered a great shame and disgrace to even speak of divorce. Compare that to current times in which even in religious sects the divorce rate is as high as those without religious affiliation (Barna Group). Not only is divorce not a taboo for the non-religious but also the religious.

G.K Chesterton pointed out, “Just as we should not accept a system that drives men to drown and shoot themselves, we should not accept a system that produces so many divorces. We must insist that divorce is a failure and that it would be much better for us to find the cause and cure rather than allow divorce to complete its destructive effect” (Ahlquist 141). It is obvious that divorce is a problem and that it has not always been such a widespread problem. The greater question is how to reverse the trends, or find the “cause and cure” as Chesterton argued. No issue in society will have an easy or simple fix to it, but there are things that we can do to help reverse the trends. If we are pro-active rather than passive about the problems of divorce we, the people of the society, can reverse the negative trends of divorce in this country.

A wise man once said, “If we travel the same road as everyone else we will end at the same destination”. If we plant the same seeds we will have the same fruit. If our views, habits and attitudes toward divorce, marriage and love are the same as everyone else, we will have the same probability of divorce. I propose that in order to reverse the trends of divorce we must begin with our families. Furthermore, I propose that if parents would teach their children the principle of waiting to date until they are ready for the commitment of marriage it would help decrease the probability of divorce for their children – the next generation.

I can recall a rhyme that my classmates taught me in 1^st grade. It went like this, “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage.” The carriage can't go before the marriage. The cart can't go before the horse. There are many ways to say this. Things only work when they are done in the proper order. Every farmer knows that if he plants his garden too early in the spring the frost will come and kill his young plants. There is a proper order set out in nature for planting. Likewise there is a proper order set out in the marriage relationship. Also without following that specific order there will be consequences. The modern dating method often brings the intimacy before the commitment - the carriage before the marriage.

Think about what our system looks like. A young man notices a young girl who attracts him. He asks her out on a date, and she agrees. If neither one likes the other, then they both have had a bad experience. If they initially “hit it off” and continue the relationship, then the eventual temptation to become intimate is strong. Then one of the “sweethearts” is interested in staying together but the other has a change of heart, the feelings go away, and he wants out of the relationship. An endless supply of emotional snarls and complications come with a break-up of the “lovers”. The young man notices another young lady who interests him. And the cycle continues. “The modern dating system does not train young people to form a relationship. It trains them to form a series of relationships, and further trains them to harden themselves to the break-up of all but the current one” (Bailey). Old habits are difficult to break. What happens after this man finally settles down and marries? What happens when he wakes up and realizes he doesn't have the feeling that he did for his wife? He must not be in love, he reasons, or he must have married the wrong person. Then he wants out, just like he did with every other relationship. It has been said that dating is preparation for divorce. This is said because of the habit of break-up that occurs through the modern dating system.

It could also be noted that the modern dating system's purpose is for pleasure and entertainment. There is no end to dating, no underlining purpose. This hasn't always been the purpose of dating. In times past, persons only became romantically involved when they had the intent of marriage as an end. They waited to become romantic when they could have the commitment. Parents need to teach these principles to their children.

I believe with the teaching of good principles in regards to dating, love and marriage, parents could help decrease the likelihood of divorce for their children. Specifically, the teaching the principle of waiting to date until one is ready for commitment.

(I wrote this for a assignment in English class. Didn't make a very good grade on it but thought I'ld share anyhow...)

quote

"I believe that any Christian who is qualified to write a good popular book on any science may do much more by that than by any directly apologetic work.... we must attack the enemy's line of communication. What we want is not more little books about Christianity, but more little books by Christians in other subjects, with their Christianity latent.... it is not the books written in direct defence of materialism that make the modern man a materialist; it is the materialistic assumptions in all other books. In the same way it is not books on Christianity that will really trouble him. But he would be troubled if, whenever he wanted a cheap popular introduction to some science, the best work on the market was always by a Christian." ~C.S. Lewis